Image macros that make you laugh, cry, or both.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Mon Apr 23, 2012 4:19 am

This is my philosophy, so I'm making it my signeture. Ha.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:30 am

Please make your sig something that doesn't have a fixed width, as it can screw up pages for people surfing in windowed mode.

You could spoiler tag that strip though.

-Username17

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Mon Apr 23, 2012 6:40 am

You could also take it in Photoshop, brighten and shrink it.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Tue Apr 24, 2012 1:28 am

Oops. I didn't realize that it would be that big. Sorry.

Oh, and I can now die happy because Frank Trollman said "please" to me.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Wed Apr 25, 2012 2:40 pm

Starmaker · Post by **Starmaker** » Wed Apr 25, 2012 6:40 pm

Cynic wrote:pic

This. I went by a movie theater sometime last month and saw four huge posters side by side:
- Battleship the movie
- "The Jock and the Nerd" (a.k.a. 21 Jump Street)
- Muppets the movie
- The Raven the movie, some dude starring as Edgar Allan Poe.

It looked like god took part in a Cracked photoshop contest.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Apr 25, 2012 10:21 pm

Just posting this up for Ted.

erik · Post by **erik** » Wed Apr 25, 2012 11:18 pm

Starmaker wrote:
Cynic wrote:pic
This. I went by a movie theater sometime last month and saw four huge posters side by side:
- Battleship the movie
- "The Jock and the Nerd" (a.k.a. 21 Jump Street)
- Muppets the movie
- The Raven the movie, some dude starring as Edgar Allan Poe.

It looked like god took part in a Cracked photoshop contest.

Add this to movie posters that I wouldn't expect to be legit...

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Thu Apr 26, 2012 2:34 am

See, the last one is actually quite a funny book. It definitely has piqued my curiosity in relation to the adaptation.

Stahlseele · Post by **Stahlseele** » Thu Apr 26, 2012 6:29 am

Pride and Prejudice - And Zombies!
War and Peace - And Werewolves!

Avoraciopoctules · Post by **Avoraciopoctules** » Fri Apr 27, 2012 7:18 pm

I am a Retsupurae enthusiast.

Whatever · Post by **Whatever** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 3:46 am

Stahlseele wrote:Pride and Prejudice - And Zombies!
War and Peace - And Werewolves!

Sense and Sensibility - And Sea Monsters!

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 4:14 am

An oldie but goodie.

Avoraciopoctules · Post by **Avoraciopoctules** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 6:43 am

K · Post by K » Sat Apr 28, 2012 7:13 am

Type "zerg rush" into Google.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 7:30 am

K wrote:Type "zerg rush" into Google.

My favorite's always been typing 'recursion' into google search.

erik · Post by **erik** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 2:53 pm

Living in a super-hero town is likely a huge pain in the ass.

From http://balazo.net/

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:58 am

Not like this isn't new information but it's always fun to remind people about it.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed May 02, 2012 4:29 am

BRITISH VERSION OF THIS:

1. BOIL THE KETTLE - IF YOU HAVE TO USE A STOVE OR MICROWAVE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR HOUSE

2. USE ANY WATER IN EXISTENCE - F*** FILTERING THAT S*** YOU DON’T HAVE TIME TO MAKE A PROFILE YOUR SHOW IS BACK ON IN 5 MINUTES PRESS A

3. THROW WHATEVER THE HELL TEABAG YOU HAVE IN THERE - F*** LOOSE TEA THAT IS FOR WHEN YOU ORDER TEA OUTSIDE

4. USE YOUR STIRRING TEABAG METHOD OF CHOICE, ADD SUGAR/SWEETENER LIKE A BOSS OR NOT IF YOU ARE A HEALTHY BOSS

5. GRUMBLE LIKE A FISHERMAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE KETTLE AREA TO GO TO THE FRIDGE TO GET MILK AND BACK TO IT AGAIN AFTER YOU ADD IT

6. RUN BACK TO WHATEVER YOU WERE DOING, TAKE A COMFORT SIP AND THEN EITHER FINISH IT OR FORGET ABOUT IT AND MOAN ABOUT THE FACT THAT YOU LET IT GO COLD

****
EDIT: IF YOU CAN’T SPOT IF NOT FROM THIS ALONE THEN THE NATURE OF MY TUMBLR THAT I’M NOT MAKING A DIG AT HER COMIC SIMPLY POINTING OUT HOW LAZY WE ARE OVER HERE WITH TEA THEN GET OFF THE INTERNET. THE COMIC COVERS ALL TEA OPTIONS. COME AT ME BRO.

THE AUSTRALIAN VERSION

JUST GET THE BLOODY BILLY ON THE FIRE AND THROW IN A FISTFUL OF TEA FOR EACH BUGGER AFTER THE WATER BOILS

TAKE OFF FIRE

WAIT UNTIL IT REACHES DESIRED STRENGTH

CAPABLE OF SUPPORTING A SPOON STOOD UPRIGHT IN IT IS IDEAL

WHACK BILLY TO ENCOURAGE SINKING OF TEA LEAVES

POUR IT OUT

ADD AS MUCH MILK AND SUGAR AS YOU LIKE OR NOT AT ALL VEGEMITE IS ACCEPTABLE

DRINK IT DOWN WHILE RIDING OFF INTO THE OUTBACK ON YOUR BIG RED KANGAROO ON A SADDLE MADE OF DROPBEAR PELTS, WITH YOUR TRUSTY BRUMBY PACKING ALONG YOUR SWAG AND A DINGO BY YOUR SIDE

CHEERS MATE

CANADIAN VERSION

WHAT IS ENGLAND DOING?

OK NOW COPY THAT S*** AND JUST CHANGE A FEW THINGS

NO PUSSY REAL “TEAWARE”, WE HAVE NORMAL COFFEE MUGS FOR THAT S***.

USE WHATEVER APPLIANCE YOU WANT TO HEAT THE D*** WATER, YEAH WE SIGNED OUR F***ING FREEDOM. NO ONE SAID IT WAS MANDATORY FOR KETTLES!

SIT LIKE A CLASSY MAN/WOMAN AND WAIT FOR IT TO BOIL

EAT SOME BACON

THROW A TEABAG IN THERE, LOOSE TEA IS FOR MY MONARCHIST AUNT.

DUMP SO MUCH SUGAR IN IT THAT YOU GET DIABETES AND SO MUCH MILK THAT YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE AND MILK THE COW, BETSY.

TAKE A SIP.

SCALD YOURSELF AND ALMOST DROP MUG, SPILLING IT DOWN THE FRONT OF YOUR BACK IN THE PROCESS.

REALIZE TEA ISN’T TOO MUCH OF YOUR THING AND GO BACK TO COFFEE.

AMERICAN VERSION

FIND A CUP(?) (ANY CLEAN, CUP-LIKE INSTRUMENT WILL WORK)

FILL IT WITH TAP WATER

ADD FIVE SPOONFULS OF INSTANT ICED TEA POWDER

STIR THAT S*** SO HARD YOU SPILL SOME ON THE COUNTER, LET GO OF THE SPOON SO YOU CAN WATCH IT SPIN

DRINK IT AND CHOKE BECAUSE IT’S TOO SWEET

POUR SOME INTO THE SINK AND ADD WATER IN HOPES THAT IT WILL TASTE ACCEPTABLE

REPEAT UNTIL YOU GET IT RIGHT

ADD ICE CUBES AND A STRAW TO ENHANCE CLASSINESS

TEXAS VERSION

GET YOUR CUP AND SCOOP WATER FROM A STREAM, POP IN AN IODINE TABLET IF YOU’RE A SISSY FROO FROO YANK

PUT IN AN ENTIRE BOX OF LIPTON TEA BAGS

IF THERE AREN’T OVER THIRTY TEABAGS READY EMPTY OUT THE CONTENTS OF A SHOTGUN SHELL INTO THE BREW

POUR AN ENTIRE BAG OF SUGAR IN

LEAVE THAT S*** ON THE 115º F ASPHALT FOR TWO HOURS

REFRIGERATE AND POUR OVER ICE

WANTED HOT TEA? TOO F***ING BAD, LIVE SOMEWHERE ELSE

SOUTHERN VERSION

WHAT THE FUCK IS LOOSE LEAF TEA, KETTLES, STRAINERS, YOU PEOPLE THINK WE HAVE THAT SHIT JUST LYING AROUND THE HOUSE? FUCKING TEA SNOBS, WE EMANCIPATED FROM THE NORTH FOR A REASON.

TAKE LIKE EIGHT BAGS OF LIPTON, TIE ALL THEIR STRINGS TOGETHER, AND THROW THEM IN A GALLON PITCHER OF SINK WATER.

NUKE THAT SHIT IN THE MICROWAVE FOR LIKE TWENTY MINUTES.

TAKE IT OUT AND DUMP LIKE A CUP OF SUGAR IN THAT SHIT.

MIX WITH A FUCKING LADLE.

EITHER ICE THAT SHIT UP OR PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE UNTIL YOU WANT TO DRINK IT.

SERVE IN REGULAR DRINKING GLASSES. LEMON OPTIONAL.

EX-PAT BRIT VERSION

SEARCH THIRTY-ODD FOOD STORES FOR SOMETHING LABELED “TEA” THAT ACTUALLY HAS TEA IN IT AND NOT LEMON RASPBERRY HERB CRAPPITY DOO-DAA

FIND CELESTIAL SEASONINGS SECTION. SHIELD EYES, HISS, RETREAT

PURCHASE PG TIPS FROM SPECIALTY MARKET FOR $50

PLACE TEA BAG IN FAVORITE KEEP-CALM-AND-CARRY-ON MUG

OR THAT BIG ONE WITH CATS ON IT THAT ONE’S PRETTY GOOD TOO

FUCK THE WHOLE PROCESS AS LONG AS HOT WATER STRIKES THE TEA BAG AND NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND WE’RE GOOD

WAIT TO STEEP

EITHER A) GROW IMPATIENT AND STIR THAT SHIT AROUND LIKE A TYPHOON OR B) WALK AWAY AND FORGET ABOUT IT FOR THREE HOURS

IF A, GROW IMPATIENT ANYWAY AND WALK AWAY TO WATCH THE TELLY. FORGET TEA FOR THREE HOURS

FIND COLD TEA AND SWEAR LIKE A SAILOR

HEAT TEA IN MICROWAVE

FORGET TEA FOR ANOTHER HOUR

FIND TEA, SWEAR, MICROWAVE

ADD MILK AND SUGAR

TOO HOT, SWEAR, ADD MORE MILK (AND SUGAR BECAUSE WHY NOT)

TOO MUCH MILK AND SUGAR. SWEAR.

STILL TOO HOT. SWEAR MORE.

FORGET TEA FOR ANOTHER TWO HOURS

FIND TEA, SWEAR, MICROWAVE.

ENJOY YOUR EVENING CUP OF OVERSTEWED TEPID MORNING TEA

PINE FOR ENGLAND

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Wed May 02, 2012 5:35 am

The Southern one is pretty close to accurate. Except my recipe is...oh, a cup-and-a-half of sugar per gallon, since I'm trying to cut back on the sweets lately.

And you nuke the brew for five minutes and let it sit for 20-40.

And the sugar must go into the pitcher first, so that the hot tea is poured on top of it.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed May 02, 2012 6:14 am

I like the Ex Pat Brit one. If I believed in past lives, I'd swear I was british immediately prior to this life.

Ted the Flayer · Post by **Ted the Flayer** » Wed May 02, 2012 6:31 am

http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20120502.gif

Parthenon · Post by **Parthenon** » Wed May 02, 2012 11:22 am

I am terrible at explanations sorry!

If you're terrible at explanations don't make comics trying to explain things.

Oh, and you can't use tap or bottled water. Um... do you go to the nearest stream? Collect rainwater? What? She really is bad at explanations.